I Gotta Feeling that I Wanna Quit

Feelings of failure and hopelessness, defeatedness (that isn’t a real word, but it fits).  Recently, I began an “Overcoming Obstacles/Goal Setting” journey.  Here is the process I walked through:

1. Listed three goals (new habits I wanted in my life), the why to each, the action plan, and the dates to achieve them. 
2. Designed a simple and appealing goal and habit tracking system, using my daughter’s template on PowerPoint. Hung it by my desk.
3. Sticky note time!  This is my favorite part, because it feels like I am a kid doing something rebellious.  I stick those tiny yellow things onto my bedroom door and number them “1-21”. 
4. Searched for a “habit tracking app”.  Listed my 3 new habits (reasons, action steps, dates) on my chosen app:  Remente  (free version)

Initially, I was off to a great start for week one.  I walked by those sticky notes and told them, “You’re coming down today #3! So take that!”  Yep, I spoke sternly to my sticky notes!!  No “Mrs. Nice Lady” here.  In reality, I am talking to the bad habits I want to defeat and crush, because they are not allowing me to grow into my best self.  They create chaos and disorder. 

Moving into the second week of my new goal program, things got even crazier and less sticky notes came down.  My school principal challenged the staff with a “Game of Games” contest.  Daily, we met with our different teams on video calls.  Not holding back with our competitiveness, we dressed in elaborate costumes while having the most creative settings and props.  We participated with full effort during our already packed Home Learning teaching schedule. It was fun yet exhausting!

I totally missed tracking my goals and new habits that week.  I looked at my sticky note door, and faced a crossroad.  I could be upset with myself and just yank the notes all down, giving into the feeling of defeat.  But, I learned from my Lifestyle Design Coach, Holly Rigsby (Founder of EverydayJoi.com), that there is a difference between emotions and feelings.  I had discouraging emotions, but I didn’t have to give into the feeling of defeat and respond by quitting. 

As I considered quitting the goals and new habits that would allow me to reclaim ownership of my life, I further thought, “Yeah, it would be nice to live a more empowered life, but maybe I’m just not cut out to develop new habits and create positive change.”   There in front of me was an imaginary line on the floor.  I visualized it.  I could move my feet back and turn away from my hopes of accomplishing these goals, OR I could push through with perseverance and tenacity to JUMP over that line.  I chose to make a decision not based on my feelings and emotions. CROSS THE LINE!

The decision to CONTINUE and PRESS ON came on my like a flood, as I was drenched with DETERMINATION!  I don’t have to start over, because I already had 5 days down.  I can keep going even if I don’t finish it in 21 consecutive days.  Just take it one day at a time, even if they are not in order.  Small steps in the right direction add up to BIG stuff.

Too often when we fall behind with a goal, we feel hopeless.  But, I want to push you to NOT GIVE UP on your goals.  Just look at WHAT WE ALL ENDURED:  Stay at Home Orders for our entire country.  We have gone eight plus weeks in isolation at home! You have so much GRIT in you!

Whether you are searching for a new career or job change, looking to improve your health, training for some athletic event, completing a class to retrain your skill set, managing your free time better, or just reframing how you interact with your family, YOU HAVE IT IN YOU to achieve the goal or new habit.

Honestly, I believe that achieving our goals and forming new habits comes down to three words:  DON’T GIVE UP!  WHEN we make deliberate and defined effort towards little changes each day, how can we not be refined?  I love the story of the diamond.  According to Geology.com, “The formation of natural diamonds requires very high temperatures and pressures. These conditions occur in limited zones of Earth’s mantle about 90 miles (150 kilometers) or more below the surface, where temperatures are at least 2000 degrees Fahrenheit (1050 degrees Celsius).”  Furthermore, geologists believe that the diamond pushes its way to the surface from the Earth’s mantle during a specific type of volcanic activity.  That is totally cool!  Or hot – 2000 degrees! 

It has to hurt or feel uncomfortable to make any kind of significant change that frees us from unhealthy habits.  Guess what!?  Upon writing this entry, I am 4 days from finishing my goals!  And, I didn’t do it in 21 days as I hoped, but who cares!  I see positive change going on inside and all around me.  With a deep, relaxing breath, I am thankful I didn’t quit.  Go get your pressure suit on and feel the heat – you won’t be the same!  And that can be a really good thing.

“For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and self-discipline.”

2 Timothy 1:7